On a emotional roller coaster

Slept better last night had four hours in a row, who know it may be eight tonight!

It's my grandson's Finlay's birthday to day he's two. Don't time fly, Andy is off to see him soon and to play with him and his seven week old sister Amber, while Jane and Andy (Andy is our son-in-law Jane's husband (I will call him Andy A so not to confuse the two) gets Finley's party ready. On the way Andy's picking up a slide for him, he loves them, wish I was well enough to go and see his face when he unwraps it. Oh well there's always next year. Like all grandparents I love them so much I feel I could burst.

Feeling full of mixed emotions this morning. Last night dream is bothering me, a lot. It wasn't a bad dream but it wasn't good ether. It featured Linda my best friend while growing up and until her early death of a heart attack eight years ago, she was only 45. Linda had a wonderful disposition, she always was pleased to see you and had a laugh in her voice all the time you never saw her sad even if she was. She died in hospital laughing of course.

The dream, was set on a wonderful sunny day on top of a hill. I had been running I felt light full of energy and no pain, and covered in a healthy sweat (unusual as I don't sweat just over heat). I stopped to take in the beautiful scenery around me. There close to where I stopped was a giant oak tree in full splendor. Under it sat my friend Linda. She had packed lunch, containing fresh bread, butter, brie, and olives (not at all what she would have packed but it is my dream). We sat there hugging and saying how much we had missed each other and hope to talk again soon.
Then I woke what did she mean! Don't think I should dwell on this for to long.
Did enjoy the feeling of running though.

There's a sparrow hawk in the tree! looking down on something. the wind is blowing hard making the branch its on sway, it head is transfixed on something may be a mouse in Karen's garden? It didn't stay long probably only a few seconds but they look so beautiful in a predatory way if that's possible. I think its time for a drink of coffee, which I now can make without too much effort, I might even make my self some light lunch.

So much for my light lunch, it started out well a two egg mushroom and cheese omelette. Then the mardies came ( a sense of feeling sorry for your self) a bag of crisps looked up at me from the kitchen table, I'll have that I thought, yum but it didn't do the trick. This needed something more substantial something sweet, but what? A trip to the kitchen cupboard, yes there on the goodies shelf lay a chocolate cereal bar, not the healthy type, the I couldn't if I tried put any more calories in type. And do you know what you've guest it, no good ether. It never is food can't make you feel happy its got to come from with in.

I'm off to get my head in to a better place. There's so much to feel good about so I need to give my self a kick up the jack-say and start to look on the bright side of life.